Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Randomize
