hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
