Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
