i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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