lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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