i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
