I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Randomize
