We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
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just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
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I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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