i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
