Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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