I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
