Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Success! We fucked roommates!
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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