Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
