i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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