Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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