i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
no, he came in my armpit
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Randomize
