My underwear smells like fireworks.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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