i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
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