Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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