TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Randomize
