do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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