my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
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