I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize