i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Randomize
