So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I think pants incapable of making pants work
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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