You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Randomize
