my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
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swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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