Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
