bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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