I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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