I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
