can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Randomize