Whod you bang
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Randomize
