I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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