I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
