paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
