i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
