If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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