I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
You ruined the universe
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Randomize
