You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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