you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
