Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Randomize
