don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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