your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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