my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
he just fucked me for my cheese..
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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