well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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