Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
