i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Randomize