I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.