The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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