I think i peed on brittanys purse
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
ttyl tear gas
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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